One thing I have always had a problem with is closing chapters in my life. Looking back, I had trouble closing the "Single" chapter of my life and starting the "Marriage" chapter. Don't get me wrong. I wanted to get married. It was just hard to let go of who I was to start a "we" thing. I even have trouble putting away the Straightforward Boys' clothes after they grow out of a certain stage. I must look like a crazy woman as I thoughtfully (and sometimes tearfully) place one little outfit after another in the container. Sometimes I laugh as I place a memorable pair of shoes or hat into the container. I always take one last glance at the contents before I sadly clamp the lid in place. A huge sigh almost always follows the loud snap as I walk away feeling like another little chapter in my life has closed.
A few weeks ago, the Straightforward Son completed his first year in preschool. I had been very reluctant to send him to K-3, but had let him go just in time for him to grow up into a bold little four year old. He had two fantastic teachers who made him feel like a genius. He made tons of friends and enjoyed all kinds of fun events at school. He had been looking forward to the last day of school for weeks. Even at a young age, he understands the draw of a summer vacation! One would think that I would be thrilled to have him home (and I truly am), but I was sadly counting down the days till the end of his first year of school. It was another small chapter closing as he inches his way closer to a Kindergarten graduation (of which I am terrified).
As I watched him perform on the stage during his End of the Year Performance, I could not have been prouder. He was one of two chosen to recite his Bible verse and he did an awesome job following the directions his teachers had given him. He looked incredibly cute with his saggy tie and dress shirt and pants. There is one part I will never forget. After his class was finished performing, he ran as fast as he could down the aisle to me with pride all over his face. I know I had the same look on mine! I pray that he never loses the joy of a job well done. Afterward, all I could think about was how much he had grown up. Even though I was home part of the time, he still grew into a four year old in the blink of an eye. If he grew that fast, I bet the Straightforward Baby will grow up at light speed!
This might be a first, but I have no advice for learning how to do this better. I have tried all types of things, but nothing seems to work! Does anyone have any advice on learning to close a chapter of your life? I would love to know if there is a mom out there who knows how to deal with this???
He recites Psalm 23:1 for the program!
Singing during the program with his friends.
Hamming it up with one of his pals!
You're asking the wrong person. Like you, I totally cry when I put away Lincoln's old clothes that he can't fit into anymore ;)
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean! Ezra went back to get his teeth cleaned and to see the dentist all by himself today. It was so hard letting him go, but he did so great. It made me really proud, but at the same time he just seemed too grown up!
ReplyDeleteI think of it this way. Life is like a river and it needs to keep moving.
ReplyDeleteAnd if a baby stays a baby, then something is wrong. When I was little, I wanted my baby brothers to stay that way. But one night I had a dream that they did and I realized that the only way they could do that was if they were handicapped and I wouldn't choose that for them.
Aren't you glad that my brothers didn't stay babies?
HAHAHA....Absolutely Randi Sue! I definitely don't want them to stay babies, but I want them to hold onto some of the qualities they have right now. I am not sure if that makes sense. Glad to know Heidi! I am glad I am not the only one out there!
ReplyDeleteAn old friend of mine asked me to comment for her....thanks Natalie for the thoughts!
ReplyDelete"Shhhhhhhhhh, we know this, but don't want to hear it, lol! I have been a preschool teacher for almost 10 years and nothing beats this age group! Every day is a new learning experience not to mention their way of thinking and outlook on life at this age! It makes me smile every day I go to work!"
I know exactly how you feel. I still have clothes that belonged to Katie when she was a baby and I can't part with them, same with all my kids. Katie is almost 15 now and has a job, sings in the choir, is in the Beta Club, plays Basketball, volleyball, softball, runs track and has six younger siblings she is very involved with. It amazes me every day that she can juggle all this like a pro and still get A's. I try to look at it like this, no matter what age my kids are, even as adults, they will always be growing and learning and giving me a new reason to be a proud Mama. One thing i've learned in the last 15 years is to hold on to all the precious memories and look forward to the new ones. No matter what, they will always be your babies and have qualities that make you proud. I believe they always have the qualities we fall in love with when they are babies and toddlers, those qualities just mature with them!!
ReplyDeleteI got nothin'. :-)
ReplyDeleteI am sentimental to the point of crazy (I, too, have a clothes issue). My only way to deal is the satisfaction that I have savored each stage as much as possible and documented as much as I could. Happy mothering!!:-)
I am starting the next chapter in my life as well by going to the Recording Workshop here in OH starting 6-6-"11. With the degree I will be able to take my life, career, and busniess to the next level. The way I move on in life is just give it to God and look at what they(kids) will become whyle at the same time taking in every momment.
ReplyDeleteEveryone, I can't tell you how thankful I am to hear I am not crazy. It means the world to me! :)
ReplyDelete