Welcome to the next installment of "He Wants to Know" on the Straightforward Mom Blog! If you remember from the last installment, this is the time when I ask a guy what he would like to know about women or what they would want me to write about.
After reading the title, I can see some women already getting offended. Believe me, when I heard his question I was taken aback at first (I know what you are thinking--NO, the Straightforward Dad did NOT ask this question!). Fighting my urge to punch the asker of the question in the gut, I thought to myself, "What would motivate him to ask this question?" What made the situation even more complex (and frustrating) is that this is a guy who knows me well. Was he hinting that I was "so cranky?" After all these thoughts, I have decided to honestly try and answer this question the best I can.
I think there are a number of reasons why women are so cranky. One must look at the fact that there are physical issues that many of us deal with on a monthly (our friend Charlie comes to visit at the most inopportune moments), if not daily, basis. I have never been quite sure how to explain our physical issues to men, but I think that if they experienced some of the physical turmoil that we deal with, the issue of crankiness would be the last thing on their minds! I have to admit that I am at my crankiest right before Charlie decides to call on me. There are months where I don't even feel like the same person (and I think the Straightforward Dad would attest to this fact and say that he doesn't even know the being that often emerges during this time). It's hard not to be cranky when you feel like your innards are in turmoil. This also doesn't take into account other female physical issues that can come into play (i.e. pregnancy, menopause, pain from breastfeeding 500 times a day). I know that men have their own physical issues, but I think cutting us some slack in this department and understanding why crankiness would occur would be helpful.
There are emotional issues that men can't understand as well. I have found very few men who deal with fluctuating emotions like women. It seems we can be thrown from the throes of joy to the depths of depression very much like someone who is bipolar. Honestly, my emotions exhaust me some days. I know that is probably a terrible thing to admit, but it is the truth. If I could change this aspect of my womanly emotions, I might do some tweaking. I do like the fact that I am more emotionally connected to people, places, items (yes, I do still have every basketball tournament t-shirt because there is some memory attached to it), and other things than men seem to be (I think God made me that way). Yet, it would be nice to be able to disconnect when things make me "cranky."
Now, please don't misunderstand me guys! Just because we have things that cause us to be cranky, doesn't mean that we should allow it to make us cranky. (I just saw every woman reading this glare at me virtually!) I believe that women have to be extra careful not to let their physical situation or their emotional state get the best of them. It takes effort to keep out the "crankies." I am not the best person to blog about this because I am one of the best at allowing things to get a grip on me and cause me to be cranky. (Let's just say, if they gave a gold medal in crankiness, I would have a trophy case full.) Thankfully, this question (from a poor guy whom I will not name so he won't get hate mail) caused me to step back and say, "Why am I cranky? Why are other women considered cranky?" It also made me realize that I need to make a better effort to even keep from the appearance of crankiness. Obviously, I don't do my best and to be honest, some days I don't even try.
BUT, guys, you don't get out of the blog that easy either. You could offer a solution to the problem as well. If you want a less cranky wife--communicate. I know your favorite part of every day is to rush home and talk to your wife about her hopes and dreams, her heartaches and frustrations. Nonetheless, you need to take time (and the effort) to understand why that wonderful woman in your life is cranky. Does she need some help? Does she need someone to talk to? Does she need some "girl time?" The guy who asked this question wasn't necessarily talking about just his wife. He was talking about women in general. Guys, have you ever thought about asking your mom if you could lend a hand? Have you ever asked a female teacher if you could pray for her when she is having a bad day? What about your sister? Have you been there to listen to her when she is going through those "cranky moments?" (I know that talking to a woman during her "crankies" is not the easiest thing. I do believe that if you make the effort, you might be surprised at what you will discover.) Don't worry guys, women should be doing this for you as well. As if you guys didn't have enough stressors in life, you are expected to be our knights in shining armor. The truth is, communication between men and women is the key to good relationships (First and foremost is having God the center of any relationship--including friendships). . . and so is give and take.
I know that this will cause an interesting stir among readers, but I would love to hear your comments. And ladies, apparently we are cranky a lot. . . lets work on that!
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